Gracie gets her wish (1917 – 2010)

We hate to see You go!
We hate to see You go!
We hope to hell you never come back!
We hate to see You go!

That has always been the Bigelow parting song whenever a visit would end.  I can still remember hearing my Grandfather singing it to this day.  Grandpa died almost 18 years ago, and today, my Grandmother joined him and their dog Dusty.

I have an image in my head that will stay with me forever. Gram is in her chair holding a cigarette and the newspaper with her toast cut into squares and coffee sitting on the table next to her. Gramp is lying on the couch, with an iced tea and the television is on and showing a golf tournament. Dusty is resting peacefully on the bean bag under the big windows.

I went through my email earlier today and pulled out all of the photos that Mom has sent along over the past few years.  I think that by looking through them, you can get a sense that she was a woman who was quite unique in her own special way. This leads me to Gram getting her wish. Each time we would travel home and I would ask her how she was feeling, she would reply “Ok, but I wish I were dead”. That was Gram, always telling you how it is. Continue reading

Alone and Content

Alone and Content

no music playing, no television sounding
no lungs are burning, no heart is pounding
the laptop is off, still humming in its sleep
the baby is listless, yet not breathless
first, it starts lightly as it comes through the window
and feels as if you stepped into a spiderweb in the dead of night
then it gets louder and turns to a roar
the wall you’ve watched inch closer and closer is here
upon you
and all you can do
is turn to the window
and smaller and smaller, you close the window
until there’s still, a sliver indulging
your quiet moment forgetting of nothing
a moment that is broken by sounds of real life
of sirens and church bells going off with great strife
you come back to view that your chosen life
has lead you to sit and reflect with a tear
that you are still happy and will never fear
a moment of moments that lets you feel
alone and content

Remembering Gramp

Today, my Grandfather was laid to rest. Because of our new family, I was unable to go home for the services, but was there because Phil was kind enough to read something I wrote. I’m posting it here incase anyone would like to read it.

It is with great sorrow that I cannot be with you all today, of all days.

Gramp was a gentle man, who had a firm grip, and a smile that is unrivaled. He was devoted to his wife for 68 years, and served his country during World War II. He was soft spoken, but strong willed.

I’d like to invite everyone to join me in helping celebrate Gramp’s life by taking part in the act that I will forever remember him by.

Please look at the person next to you. Offer your hand and take theirs. Look them in the eye and squeeze their hand, and just smile, for he is with you.